I Want To Learn Something New
by LooneyLovey
Summary: What happens when Bella tries to teach Carlisle something new, something that may get a little dangerous, something like baking a cake. Will turn into a series of one-shots.


**For the purposes of this story, Bella and Carlisle are together. I don't want to put how in this story because it's supposed to be humour, not romance for a change, but if you would like to see how they got together, then I might write a little something if this generates enough interest.**

* * *

It was a normal day at the Cullen house, or as normal as any day with vampires could be. Bella Swan sat at the kitchen teaching Carlisle Cullen how to bake a cake; this was his fourth attempt. He had asked her a few days ago if she could teach him something and she had agreed but she wasn't sure what she could teach him until this morning.

On Carlisle's first attempt he burnt the cake and then dropped it, he caught it before it fell to the floor, but Bella didn't think the cake snapping in half, like a brittle twig, was a sign that it was safe to eat.

The second attempt was slightly more successful than the first; the only thing that went wrong was that the cake had caught alight and charred Carlisle's top and jeans.

The third attempt turned out to be the most disastrous thus far. When Carlisle had taken the cake out of the oven he had seen a spider, not many people were privy to the fact that Carlisle Cullen – seasoned vampire extraordinaire – hated spiders with a passion. Consequently, this meant that the cake went flying into the air as soon as he saw it. Somehow, the cake had managed to get stuck to the ceiling, Bella hadn't asked as she feared the answer would set off another laughing fit, she still hadn't recovered from the last one, thanks to his second attempt. His top had some very conveniently placed holes in it, which were quite distracting. Bella hadn't been in the room when he took the cake out of the oven, but she did happen walk in when it fell of the ceiling ... and onto his head. A small part had fallen into his mouth which then set off a coughing fit; vampires weren't supposed to eat cake.

After he had gotten rid of the cake, the spider came back. Carlisle let out a shriek worthy of a woman then ran from the room, leaving Bella to fend for herself. Not that she minded though, the spider was only the size of her little finger. When Carlisle had manage to find the guts it took to re-enter the room, he declared that he was going to have one more go and then after that he would give up, and admit defeat.

"Bella, do you see Fred anywhere?" Carlisle asked, while putting the fourth batch of cake batter into the oven. After Carlisle had ran from the room Bella befriended the spider, deciding to call it Fred – she was taking a wild guess at the spider's gender. The problem they now faced was that she had turned her back on Fred for a few minutes, and he had vanished.

"No Carlisle, for the last time I do not see Fred anywhere! You made me look in every cupboard, cup, and bowl. I think your shriek might have scared him away," she said, trying not to laugh. His head was turning at vampire speed to look everywhere for Fred at once.

"Bella, are you sure?" he asked hesitantly.

"Yes Carlisle, now be careful. Remember this is your last attempt," she warned. While she would have loved to watch him screw up baking another cake, they were running out of ingredients and she didn't feel like making a run to the shop to stock up again.

"I know, I know Bella. Last attempt. Got it," he mumbled.

As soon as he finished putting the cake in the oven – still looking everywhere for Fred – he clapped his hands together and grinned.

"I did it," he said.

"No you didn't." She watched his face fall. "What happened to your last three attempts?" she asked.

"Oh." Befuddlement was a funny expression to look at on a vampire's face, and Carlisle's face – though it was exceptionally beautiful – wasn't exempt from the rule.

"Yes, oh," she said smiling, "now come on, let's go and find something else to do while we wait for the cake to bake." She took his hand and led him into the lounge, determined to make him watch one of her favourite programs: Scrubs.

**25 minutes later**

"Cake's done!" Carlisle yelled from the kitchen.

"Is it in one piece?" she yelled back, too comfortable too move off the sofa.

"Yes, and it looks spongy!" he yelled, like an excited puppy.

Bella sighed, she had a bad feeling that something had gone wrong, but she got up from her seat in the lounge and walked towards the kitchen door, praying that attempt number four was the lucky one. When she entered the kitchen, she was met with a sight that shocked her, a cake. Not a charcoal cake, but a yellow, spongy, golden cake. Surely, it was true good to be true?

And it was.

"Carlisle, did you put the butter and sugar in here?" she asked, after swallowing the mouthful of cake he had spoon-fed her as soon as she had walked through the door.

"I knew I'd forgotten something," he said, disappointment filling his features.

"Your car or mine?" Bella sighed; it looked like she was going to have to make a trip down to the shop to get more ingredients. She couldn't stand to see the disappointed look on his face any longer.

"What?" he asked, his disappointed look replaced with of confusion.

"To get you some more ingredients. Do you want to take your car or mine?" Bella repeated.

His eyes lit up, like a child's on Christmas morning, "Mine, we can fit more in that way. Bella" he said, almost singing her name, "could we, maybe, buy ingredients for other recipes while were there?"

"Fine Carlisle," she said laughing, "But first, we master the cake."

"Deal," said Carlisle, joining in with her infectious laughter.


End file.
